The Tang Priest Is Tempted with Sex and Debauchery
Because His Nature Is Upright He Resists Unharmed
The story tells how the Great Sage and Pig were just about to use their magic to immobilize all the women when they suddenly heard the noise of a wind. Friar Sand, who was shouting, looked round at once to find the Tang Priest gone.
“Who’s taken the master?” Monkey asked.
“A woman made a whirlwind and carried him off in it,” Friar Sand reported. At this news Monkey jumped up with a whoosh to stand on his cloud and shade his eyes as he looked all around. He saw the gray dust cloud of a whirlwind that was heading Northwest.
“Brothers,” he turned back to shout, “come straight up on your clouds. We’re going after the master.” Pig and Friar Sand tied the luggage on the horse and both sprang noisily into the air.
All this gave such a fright to the queen of Western Liang and her subjects that they fell to their knees in the dust and said, “He is an arhat who has flown away in broad daylight. Do not be alarmed, Your Majesty. The Tang emperor’s brother is a dhyana monk who has mastered the Way. We were too blind to see who this man of China really was, and we allowed ourselves all that longing for nothing. Please ride back to the palace in your carriage, Your Majesty.” The queen felt ashamed as she went back into her capital with her officials, and we shall say no more of them.
Monkey and the other two disciples meanwhile were riding their clouds through the air after the whirlwind. They chased it to a high mountain, where the gray dust settled and the wind fell, so that they did not know which way the demon had gone. The brothers brought their clouds down to land to search for the way. Suddenly they noticed a gleaming rock shaped like a screen. Leading the horse round behind it they found a pair of stone doors above which was written:
DEADLY FOE MOUNTAIN PIPA CAVE
In his ignorance Pig went up to the doors and was about to beat on them with his rake when Monkey rushed forward to stop him. “Don’t be in such a hurry, brother,” he said. “After following the whirlwind we had to look around for a while before we found these doors. We don’t know what’s behind them. If they’re the wrong doors we’d stir up trouble offending the wrong people, and we don’t want to do that. You two take the horse round to the front of the rock screen and wait a moment. I’m going to take a look around and find out what’s happening here. Then it’ll be much easier to know what to do.”
Friar Sand liked this idea. “Splendid, splendid,” he said, “You’ve found the subtle solution when things were looking rough, the calm way out of the crisis.” The two of them then led the horse to the other side of the rock screen.
Monkey then showed his magic powers. Making a spell with his hands and saying the words he shook himself and turned into an exquisite bee. Just look at him:
Fine wings bending in the wind,
A narrow waist gleaming with the sun.
With his sweet mouth he searched for stamens,
While the sting in his tail killed toads.
Great was his achievement in making honey,
And he always entered the hive with courtesy.
Now be would use a brilliant plan
As he flew in under the eaves of the doorway.
Monkey squeezed in through the crack between the outer doors then past the inner doors to see a female monster sitting in a flower pavilion with serving girls in brightly-coloured embroidered clothes and their hair sticking upwards in two bunches. They were all very pleased, but he could not hear what they were talking about. Monkey flew up to them very quietly, perched on the lattice of the pavilion, and cocked his ear to listen. He saw two women with their tangled hair tied in a bun carrying two piping hot dishes of food to the pavilion and saying, “Madam, this dish has steamed rolls with human flesh in them, and that one has vegetarian ones with sweet beanpaste fillings.”
“Little ones,” said the she-devil with a smile, “Bring the Tang emperor’s brother out.” Some of the serving girls in embroidered clothes went to the room at the back to help the Tang Priest out. His face was sallow, his lips white, and his eyes red as the tears streamed down his face, “The master’s been drugged,” thought Monkey with a silent sigh.
The she-devil went down from the pavilion and showed her ten fingers that were as delicate as spring onions as she grabbed hold of Sanzang and said, “Don’t worry, emperor’s brother. This may not be as rich and splendid as the palace in the Womanland of Western Liang, but it’s peaceful and comfortable, and an ideal place for reciting the Buddha’s name and reading the scriptures. With me as your companion we’ll be able to live in harmony till we’re a hundred.” Sanzang said nothing.
“Don’t be upset,” the she-devil said. “I know that you had nothing to eat or to drink at your banquet in Womanland. Here are two dishes, one of meat and one of vegetarian food. Won’t you take some to calm your nerves?”
Sanzang thought deeply: “If I say nothing and eat nothing, this she-devil may murder me. She is worse than the queen, who was at least human and knew how to behave. What am I to do? My disciples don’t know that I’m a prisoner here. If I let her murder me I’ll be throwing my life away for nothing.” Though he racked his brains he could find no other plan, so he pulled himself together and asked, “What is the meat dish and what is the vegetarian one?”
“The meat one is steamed rolls stuffed with human flesh, and the vegetarian one steamed rolls with sweet fillings,” the she-devil replied.
“I would like some of the vegetarian ones,” said Sanzang.
“Servant girls,” said the she-devil, “bring hot tea and give your master some vegetarian steamed rolls.” A servant girl then brought in a tray of tea that she set before the Tang Priest. The she-devil broke a vegetarian roll open and handed it to Sanzang, who offered a whole meat one to her. “Why won’t you open it for me, emperor’s brother?” the she-devil asked with a smile.
“I am a man of religion, so I would not dare to break meat food,” said Sanzang.
“In that case,” said the she-devil, “Why did you eat wedding cake at the Motherhood River, and why are you insisting on eating beanpaste now?”
To this Sanzang replied,
“When the river is high I’m carried away.
When bogged down I have to slow down.”
Monkey, who could hear from his perch in the lattice just how friendly their conversation was getting, started worrying that the master’s true nature might become disturbed. It was more than he could bear, so he resumed his own appearance and brandished his cudgel with a shout of “Behave yourself, you evil beast.” When the she-devil saw him she spat out smoke and light that covered the pavilion and told her underlings to shut the Tang Priest away.
Then she seized her steel trident and leapt out through the door of the pavilion, shouting abusively, “Hooligan ape! How dare you sneak into my house to set your dirty eyes on me! Stay where you are and take this!” The Great Sage parried the lunge from her trident and fell back, fighting all the way.
When they came to the outside of the cave where Pig and Friar Sand were waiting, the sight of the hard-fought battle so alarmed Pig that he led the white horse over to Friar Sand and said, “Look after the horse and the luggage. I’m joining in.” The splendid idiot then raised his rake with both hands and rushed forward with a shout, “Stand back, brother, while I kill this vicious beast.” Seeing Pig coming the she-devil used another kind of magic to breathe fire out of her nose and smoke from her mouth as she shook herself and charged him with her trident flying and dancing. Goodness only knows how many hands she had as she somersaulted towards them, lashing out furiously. Monkey and Pig were both fought to a standstill.
“Sun Wukong,” said the she-devil, “you don’t know when to keep your head down. I know who you are, but you don’t recognize me. Even your Tathagata Buddha from the Thunder Monastery is afraid of me. Where do you think you two little wretches are going to get? Come here, all of you, and watch me beat every one of you.” It was a fine battle:
Great was the she-devil’s prowess
As the Monkey King’s anger rose.
Then Marshal Tian Peng joined in the fight,
Showing off wildly wielding his rake.
One was a many-handed mistress of the trident,
Surrounding herself with smoke and with light;
The other two were impatient and their weapons powerful,
As they stirred up many a cloud of mist.
The she-devil was fighting to win a mate,
But the monk would never lose his vital seed.
Ill-matched male and female fought it out,
Each showing heroism in the bitter struggle.
Calmly the female had built up her strength, longing for action;
The male was on guard in his love of pure stillness.
This made peace between them impossible
As trident fought for mastery with cudgel and rake.
Powerful was the cudgel,
Even stronger the rake,
But the she-devil’s trident was a match for them both.
Nobody would yield on Deadly Foe Mountain;
No mercy was given outside Pipa Cave.
One was happy at the thought of the Tang Priest as a husband;
The other two were going with him to collect the scriptures.
Heaven and earth were alarmed by the battle,
Which darkened sun and moon and displaced all the stars.
When the three of them had been fighting for a long time without anyone emerging as victor, the she-devil shook herself and used the sting in her tail to jab the Great Sage in the head. Monkey yelled in agony at the unbearable pain and fled, defeated. Seeing that things were going badly Pig withdrew too, dragging his rake behind him. The victorious she-devil put her steel trident away.
Monkey had his hands round his head and his face screwed up in agony as he shouted, “It’s terrible, it’s terrible.”
“Brother,” said Pig, going up to him, “why did you run away howling in pain just when you were fighting so well?”
“It’s agony, agony,” groaned Brother Monkey, still holding his head.
“Is it an attack of your migraine?” Pig asked.
“No, no,” said Monkey, hopping around in pain.
“But I didn’t see you get wounded,” said Pig, “so how can your head be hurting?”
“It’s unbearable,” groaned Monkey. “Just when she saw that I was beginning to beat her trident she braced herself and jabbed me in the head. I don’t know what weapon she used, but it’s made my head ache so unbearably that I had to run away, beaten.”
“In quiet places you’re always boasting that your head was tempered in the furnace,” said Pig with a laugh, “so why was that too much for you?”
“Yes,” replied Monkey, “after my head was refined I stole the magic peaches and immortal wine and Lord Lao Zi’s golden elixir tablets. When I made havoc in Heaven the Jade Emperor ordered the Strongarm Demon King and the Twenty eight Constellations to take me to be beheaded at the Dipper and Bull Palace. The gods used their cutlasses, axes, hammers and swords on me, struck me with thunderbolts and burned me with fire. Then Lao Zi put me in his Eight Trigrams Furnace and refined me for forty-nine days. None of that harmed me at all. Goodness only knows what weapon that woman used to make my head hurt like this.”
“Put your hands down and let me have a look,” said Friar Sand. “Has it been cut open?”
“No, no,” said Monkey.
“I’d better go back to Western Liang to get you some ointment to put on it,” said Pig.
“It’s not cut open or swollen; I don’t need ointment,” said Monkey.
“Brother,” laughed Pig, “I wasn’t at all ill when I was pregnant or after I lost the baby, but you’ve got a carbuncle on your forehead.”
“Stop teasing him, brother,” said Friar Sand. “It’s getting late, our eldest brother’s been wounded in the head, and we don’t know whether the master is dead or alive. What on earth are we going to do?”
“The master’s all right,” groaned Brother Monkey. “I flew in as a bee and saw the woman sitting in a flower pavilion. Before long two servant girls came in with two dishes of steamed rolls, one with fillings of human flesh and one with sweet fillings of beanpaste. She sent two other serving girls to help the master come out to eat something to soothe his nerves. She was talking about being his companion. At first he wouldn’t reply or eat any of the rolls, but she was giving him so much sweet talk that he said he’d have a vegetarian one. Goodness knows why. The woman broke one open and gave it to him, and he passed her an unbroken meat one. ‘Why won’t you open it for me?’ She asked, and he said, ‘I am a man of religion, so I would not dare to break meat food.’ Then she said, ‘In that case, why did you eat wedding cake at the Motherhood River, and why are you eating sweet fillings now?’ The master did not catch what she was driving at, and replied, ‘When the river is high I’m carried away; when bogged down I have to slow down.’ Listening to all this from the lattice I got worried that the master was going to forget himself, so I turned back into myself and hit at her with my cudgel. She used magic too, breathed out clouds, told them to shut the master away, and drove me out of the cave with her trident.”
Friar Sand bit his finger and said, “That low bitch must have followed us at some stage, she knows so much.”
“From what you say,” said Pig, “we mustn’t rest. From dusk to the middle of the night we’ve got to keep going back and challenging her to fight. We’ll have to yell and make such a din that she can’t go to bed or have it off with our master.”
“I can’t go back,” said Monkey. “My head’s hurting too badly.”
“We can’t challenge her to battle,” said Friar Sand. “Our eldest brother’s head is aching and our master is a true monk. He won’t let the illusion of sex disturb his nature. Let’s spend the light sitting somewhere under the mountain that’s sheltered from the wind. Then we can build up our energy and think of something else in the morning.” The three brother disciples tethered the white horse and guarded the luggage as they spent the night resting under the slope of the mountain.
The she-devil then put aside thoughts of murder and started to wear a mile again as she said, “Little ones, shut the front and back doors tight.” Then she sent out two scouts to keep an eye on Monkey, and ordered them to report the moment any sound was heard at the door. “Maids,” she commanded, “tidy the bedroom and get it ready. Bring candles, burn incense, and ask the Tang emperor’s brother in. I’m going to make love with him.”
The Tang Priest was then helped out from the back, while the she-devil, looking utterly bewitching, took him by the hand and said, “As the saying goes, pleasure’s worth more than gold. You and I are going to have some fun as man and wife.”
The venerable elder clenched his teeth and let out not a sound. He would have preferred not to go with her but he was afraid she might kill him, so in fear and trembling he accompanied her into the bridal chamber, he was as if stupefied and dumb. He would not lift his head and look up, let alone catch sight of the bed and the curtains in the room, and even less did he see the intricately carved furniture or her hairstyle and clothing. He was deaf and indifferent when she spoke of her desire. He was indeed a fine monk:
His eyes saw no evil beauty,
His ears heard no voluptuous words.
To him the brocade and the lovely face was dung,
The gold, the jewels and the beauty so much dirt.
The love of his life was contemplation;
He never took a step from Buddha land.
He did not care for female charms,
Knowing only how to nourish his true nature.
The she-devil
Was full of life
And unbounded desire.
The venerable monk
Seemed almost dead,
His mind fixed on meditation.
One was soft jade and warm fragrance;
The other was dead ash and withered wood.
One spread open the bridal sheets,
Full of voluptuousness;
The other fastened his tunic more tightly,
His heart ever true.
One longed to press her breasts against him and entwine their limbs
In rapturous union;
The other wanted only to sit facing the wall
Like the monk Bodhidharma.
The she-devil took off her clothes,
Displaying her smooth skin and fragrant body;
The Tang Priest pulled his robes together,
Covering the roughness of his hide and flesh.
The she-devil said,
“There is room on my pillow and under my sheet:
Why not come to bed?”
The Tang Priest replied,
“My head is shaven and I wear monk’s robes:
I may not join you.”
She said, “I would like to be Liu Cuicui in the story.”
He replied, “But I am not like the Monk of the Moonlight.”
The she-devil said, “I am more lovely than Xi Shi herself.”
“Long was the king of Yue buried on her account,” the monk replied.
“Do you remember the lines,” the she-devil asked,
“‘I’m willing to die and be buried under flowers;
Even as a ghost shall I live and love?’”
To this the Tang Priest replied,
“My true masculinity is my great treasure;
I could not lightly give it to a bag of bones like you.”
The two of them kept up their battle of words till it was late in the night, and the Tang Priest’s resolution was unmoved. The she-devil kept tugging at his clothes, refusing to let go of him, while the master kept up his resistance. The struggle went on till the middle of the night, when the she-devil finally lost her temper and called, “Bring rope, little ones.” Sadly she had her beloved man tied up like a dog and dragged outside to the portico. Then the silver lamps were blown out and everyone went to bed for the night.
Before they knew it the cocks had crowed three times. On the mountainside the Great Sage Monkey leaned forward and said, “This head of mine ached for a while, but now it doesn’t hurt or feel numb. It’s just a bit itchy.”
“If it’s itchy then what about letting her jab it again for you?” said Pig with a grin.
“We’ve got to make her let him go,” said Monkey, spitting.
”‘Let him go, let him go,’” mocked Pig. “I bet our master spent last night having a go.”
“Stop arguing, you two,” said Friar Sand. “It’s light now. We’ve got to capture that demon as quickly as we can.”
“Brother,” said Monkey, “you stay here and look after the horse. Don’t move. Pig, come with me.”
The idiot braced himself, tightened the belt round his black cotton tunic and went with Monkey as each of them leapt up to the top of the car and arrived beneath the stone screen, weapon in hand. “You stand here,” said Monkey. “I’m afraid that the she-devil may have harmed the master during the night, so wait while I go in and find out. If he was seduced by her into losing his primal masculinity and ruining his virtue then we’ll all split up. But if he kept his spirit firm and his dhyana heart was unmoved we’ll have to hold out till we’ve killed the she-devil and rescued the master. Then we can head West.”
“Idiot!” said Pig. “As the saying goes, can a dried fish be a cat’s pillow? Even if she didn’t succeed she’ll have had a good grab at him.”
“Stop talking such nonsense,” said Monkey. “I’m going to have a look.”
The splendid Great Sage took his leave of Pig and went round the rock screen. Then he shook himself, turned back into a bee, and flew inside, where he saw two serving girls sound asleep with their heads pillowed on their watch-keepers’ clappers and gongs. When he reached the flower pavilion he found that the devils were still asleep, exhausted after being up half the night, and not aware that it was dawn. Monkey then flew on to the back of the cave, where he could half hear Sanzang’s voice. He looked up to see the master with his hands and feet all roped together under the portico. Landing lightly on Sanzang’s head he said, “Master.”
Recognizing his voice, Sanzang said, “Is that you, Wukong. Rescue me!”
“Did you have a good time last night?” Monkey asked.
“I would have died first,” Sanzang replied through clenched teeth.
“Yesterday it looked to me that she was in love with you,” Monkey continued, “so why has she been torturing you like this?”
“She pestered me for half the night,” Sanzang replied, “but I never undid my clothes or even touched the bed. She only tied me up and left me here when she saw that I was not going to give in to her. Whatever happens you must rescue me so that I can go and fetch the scriptures.” By now their conversation had woken the she-devil up. Ferocious though she was she still could not bear to lose Sanzang.
As she woke up and sat up she heard him saying “fetch the scriptures,” rolled straight out of bed, and shrieked, “What do you want to go and fetch scriptures for instead of being my husband?”
This alarmed Monkey, who left the master, spread his wings, flew out, turned back into himself, and shouted for Pig. The idiot came round the stone screen and asked, “Well? Did it happen?”
“No,” laughed Monkey, “it didn’t. She kept pawing him but he wouldn’t go along with her, so she lost her temper and tied him up. Just when he was telling me what had happened the fiend woke up and I had to rush out in a panic.”
“What did the master say?” Pig asked.
“He told me that he never undid his clothes,” Monkey replied, “and never even touched the bed.”
“That’s wonderful,” said Pig. “He’s a true monk. Let’s go and save him.”
The idiot was too crude to bother with arguing: he lifted his rake and brought it down with all his might against the doors, smashing them to pieces. This gave the serving girls who were asleep with their heads pillowed on their watch-keepers’ clappers and gongs such a fright that they ran to the inner doors shouting, “Open up! The two ugly men who came here last night have smashed the front doors down.”
The she-devil was just coming out of her bedroom when four or five serving girls came rushing in to report, “Madam, the two ugly men who were here yesterday have come back and smashed the front doors down.”
On hearing this the she-devil ordered, “Little ones, boil water at once for me to wash and comb my hair.” Then she told them, “Carry the emperor’s brother roped up as he is and lock him up in the back room. I’m going out to fight them.”
Out went the splendid monster, brandishing her trident and shouting abusively, “Vicious ape! Dirty hog! Ignorant beast! How dare you come knocking down my doors!”
“Filthy whore,” Pig retaliated, “you tie our master up and then you have the nerve to talk tough like that. You tried to seduce our master into being your husband. Give him back now and we’ll spare your life. If there’s so much as a hint of a ‘no’ from you this rake of mine will smash your whole mountain down.”
The demon did not allow any more argument but summoned up her spirits and used the same magic as before to breathe out smoke and fire as she thrust at Pig with her steel trident. Swerving aside to avoid the blow, Pig struck back with his rake. When Monkey joined in to help him with his cudgel the she-devil used more magic to give herself endless pairs of hands with which to parry their weapons to left and to right. When they had fought four or five rounds the mystery weapon jabbed Pig in the lip, making him flee for his life, dragging his rake behind him and pressing a hand to his mouth. Monkey, who was also rather scared of her, feinted with his cudgel and fled in defeat too. The she-devil went back into her cave in victory, telling her underlings to build up a temporary outer barrier with rocks.
Friar Sand heard piggish groans as he was pasturing the horse and looked up to see Pig coming towards him with his hand on his face and moaning. “What’s up?” Friar Sand asked.
“It’s terrible, terrible,” the idiot groaned, “the pain, the pain.”
He was still complaining when Monkey turned up too, saying with a grin, “Idiot! Yesterday you wished me a carbuncle on my forehead, and today you’ve got one on your lip.”
“I can’t bear it,” groaned Pig, “it’s agony, it’s excruciating.”
Just as the three of them were at a loss as to what to do an old woman came by with a green bamboo basket carrying wild vegetables from the hills to the South. “Brother,” said Friar Sand to Monkey, “that woman’s coming this way. I’ll ask her who this evil spirit is and what weapon she has that causes such terrible wounds.”
“You stay here while I go and ask her,” Monkey said, and taking a quick look he saw that there was a halo of auspicious cloud directly above the old woman’s head, and that fragrant mists were all around her.
Recognizing who it was, Monkey called out, “Come and kowtow, brothers. This lady is the Bodhisattva.” This so surprised them that Pig kowtowed despite his pain, Friar Sand bowed low as he held the horse, and Monkey fell to his knees and called, “I submit to The Merciful and Compassionate Deliverer from Suffering, the Miraculously Responding Bodhisattva Guanyin.”
Seeing that they had recognized her, the Bodhisattva rose up into midair on her auspicious cloud and appeared in her true form as the carrier of the fish basket. Going up into the sky with her, Monkey kowtowed and reported, “Bodhisattva, please forgive your disciple for failing to come to meet you. Because we were so busy trying to save the master we did not realize that you had come to see us. We are now up against a monster we can’t beat, and we beseech you, Bodhisattva, to help us.”
“She is indeed a very terrible monster,” the Bodhisattva replied. “Her trident is really the two claws she was born with, and what causes such agonizing wounds is a sting in her tail called ‘horse-killer poison’. She was originally a scorpion spirit who used to listen to the Buddha preaching the scriptures on the Thunder Monastery. When the Tathagata Buddha saw her and mistakenly tried to push her away with his hand she used her tail to sting him on his left thumb. The Buddha in his pain told one of the vajrapanis to arrest her and she is now here. You will have to ask someone else for help as I too have to keep my distance from her.”
Monkey then bowed again and said, “I beg the Bodhisattva for further instructions. Please tell your disciple whom I should go to see to ask for help.”
“Go to the Palace of Light inside the Eastern Gate of Heaven and look for the Star Officer of the Pleiades. He will be able to subdue her.” Having spoken she turned into a beam of golden light and went straight back to the Southern Ocean.
The Great Sage Monkey then brought down his cloud and said to Pig and Friar Sand, “Don’t worry, brothers. Our master has a star to save him.”
“Where?” Friar Sand asked.
“The Bodhisattva has just told me to ask the help of the Star Officer of the Pleiades,” Monkey said. “I’m off.”
“Brother,” groaned Pig, his hand still on his mouth, “please ask the star lord for some ointment to stop this pain.”
“You don’t need any ointment,” laughed Monkey. “After a night’s pain it’ll get better, just as mine did last night.”
“Stop all that talk,” said Friar Sand, “and get there as fast as you can.”
The splendid Monkey set off at once on his somersault cloud and was outside the Eastern Gate of Heaven in an instant. The Heavenly King Virudhaka suddenly appeared to greet him courteously and ask, “Where are you going, Great Sage?”
“I want to go to the Palace of Light to see the Star Lord of the Pleiades because the Tang Priest I’m escorting to the West to fetch the scriptures is being pestered by a devil,” Monkey said. Then the four marshals Tao, Zhang, Xin and Deng appeared to ask Monkey where he was going.
“I’m looking for the Star Officer of the Pleiades to subdue a demon and rescue my master,” he said.
To this they answered, “The star officer has gone on an inspection to the Star-viewing Tower today at the Jade Emperor’s command.”
“Is that true?” Monkey asked.
“We left the Dipper and Bull Palace with him,” Heavenly Lord Xin said, “and we would not dare lie about it.”
“He has been gone for a long time,” Heavenly Lord Tao said, “so he may be back by now. Great Sage, you would do best to go to the Palace of Light first, and if he is not back, go on to the Star-viewing Tower.”
This delighted the Great Sage, who took his leave of them and went to the gate of the Palace of Light. Finding that the star officer was indeed not there he was just about to leave when he noticed a column of soldiers outside. Behind them was the star lord returning in his court dress sewn with golden thread. This is how he looked:
The Five Peak pins in his hat gleamed gold;
The mountain and river tablet he held was of the finest jade.
The Seven Stars hung from his waist amid clouds and mist;
Bright were the rings of jade on his Eight-pole sash.
His pendants chimed with a rhythmical sound;
The wind rushing past made a noise like bells.
The Star Officer of the Pleiades came holding his kingfisher fan;
While clouds of heavenly incense filled the hall.
When the soldiers in the front ranks saw Monkey standing outside the Palace of Light they hurried back to report, “My lord, the Great Sage Sun is here.” The star officer put away his clouds and tidied his court dress, then when the attendants carrying his insignia of office stood aside to left and right he stepped forward to greet Monkey courteously and ask, “Why are you here, Great Sage?”
“I have come especially to pay my respects and beg you to rescue my master from disaster,” Brother Monkey replied.
“What disaster, and where?” the star officer asked.
“He is in the Pipa Cave on Deadly Foe Mountain in Western Liang,” Monkey replied.
“What evil monster is there in the cave that you should need to send for me?” asked the star officer.
“The Bodhisattva Guanyin appeared to us just now,” Monkey said, “and told us that she is a scorpion spirit. She specially mentioned you, sir, as the only person who would be able to control her. That is why I have come here to ask your help.”
“I would have preferred to submit a memorial to the Jade Emperor,” the star officer replied, “but as you have come here, Great Sage, and as I am much obliged to the Bodhisattva for recommending me I would not like to lose any more time. Excuse me if I don’t offer you tea: let’s go down to subdue the demon. I can report back to His Majesty on my return.”
At that the Great Sage went out with the star officer through the Eastern Gate of Heaven and straight back to Western Liang. Seeing Deadly Foe Mountain not far off, Monkey Pointed to it and said, “That’s the mountain.” The star lord brought his cloud down and went with Monkey to the slope in front of the stone screen.
“Get up, brother,” said Friar Sand to Pig on seeing them. “Brother Monkey is back with the star officer.”
“Forgive me,” said the idiot, his hand still pressed over his mouth, “forgive me, but I’m too ill to pay you all the courtesies.”
“But you are one who cultivates his conduct,” the star lord said. “How can you be ill?”
“The she-devil jabbed me in the lip when I was fighting her,” Pig replied, and it still hurts.”
“Come here,” said the star lord, “and I’ll cure it for you.”
Only then did the idiot put his hands down as he groaned, “Please, please cure it for me. I’ll pay you well when it’s better.” The star lord then touched his lip and blew on it, at which the pain stopped. A delighted Pig went down on his knees and kowtowed to the star lord. “Wonderful, wonderful,” he said.
“Will you touch my head too?” asked Monkey with a smile.
“Why?” the star lord asked. “You weren’t jabbed with the poison.”
“I was yesterday,” said Monkey, “and it only stopped hurting after last night. It’s still rather numb and itchy and may be bad again when the weather turns overcast, which is why I would like you to cure it.” The star officer then touched and blew on his head too, thus removing the remaining poison and stopping the numbness and itching.
“Brother,” said a wrathful Pig, “let’s go and fight that vicious creature.”
“Yes, yes,” the star lord said, “you two call her out so that I can put her in her place.”
Monkey and Pig leapt up the slope and went round the stone screen once more. Yelling insults the idiot used his hands like picks and hit with his rake to clear a way through the wall of stones that had been built outside the mouth of the cave. Once through these outer defenses he struck again with his rake to smash the inner doors to sawdust, giving the little devils behind them such a shock that they ran inside to report, “Madam, those two hideous men have smashed the inner doors now.” The she-devil had just had the Tang Priest untied and sent for some vegetarian breakfast for him when she heard the inner doors being smashed. Leaping out of her flower pavilion she thrust at Pig with her trident. He parried with his rake while Monkey joined in the fight from the side. The she-devil went right up to them and was just going to use her vicious trick when the two of them, who now knew what she was about, turned and fled.
As soon as the two of them were round the rock Monkey shorted, “Where are you, star lord?” The star lord stood up at once on the mountainside in his original form as a giant rooster with twin combs. When he raised his head he was six or seven feet tall, and as soon as he crowed the monster reverted to her true appearance as a scorpion spirit the size of a pipa mandolin. When the star officer crowed again the monster’s whole body crumbled in death. There is a poem as evidence that goes,
With fancy combs and a tasseled neck,
Hard claws, long spurs and angry eyes,
Nobly he leaps, complete in all his powers,
Towering majestic as three times he cries.
He is no common fowl who by a cottage crows
But a star down from the sky in all his glory.
Vainly the vicious scorpion took a human form:
Revealed now as herself she ends her story.
Pig went forward and said, one foot planted on the monster’s back, “Evil beast, You won’t be able to use your horse-killer poison this time.” The monster did not move, whereupon the idiot pounded her to mincemeat with his rake. The star lord gathered his golden light around him once more and rode away on his cloud. Monkey, Pig and Friar Sand all raised their clasped hands to Heaven in thanks.
“We have put you to much trouble,” they said. “We shall go to your palace to thank you another day.”
When the three of them had finished expressing their gratitude they bot the luggage and the horse ready and went into the cave, where the young and old serving girls were kneeling on either side saying, “My lords, we are not evil spirits but women from Western Liang who were carried off by the evil spirit. Your master is sitting in the scented room at the back crying.”
On hearing this Monkey took a very careful look around, and seeing that there were indeed no more devilish vapors he went round to the back and called, “Master!” The Tang Priest was very pleased indeed to see them all there.
“Good disciples,” he said, “I have put you to such a lot of trouble. What has happened to that woman?”
“That damned female was really a scorpion,” said Pig. “Luckily the Bodhisattva Guanyin told us what to do. Brother Monkey went to the palaces of Heaven to ask the Star Lord of the Pleiades to come down and defeat the demon. I’ve beaten her to pulp. That’s why we dared to come right inside to see you, Master.”
The Tang Priest thanked them deeply. They then looked for some meat-free rice and noodles and laid on a meal for themselves that they ate. The kidnapped women were all taken down the mountain and shown the way back home. Then they lit a firebrand and burned down all the buildings there before helping the Tang Priest back on his horse and continuing along the main road West. Indeed:
They cut themselves off from worldly connections,
Turning away from the lures of desire.
By pushing right back the ocean of gold,
In their minds and their hearts their awareness was higher.
If you don’t know how many years were to pass before they finally won their true achievement, listen to the explanation in the next installment.